Determine what true desires are behind your negative emotions
1. Anger. If you don't get what you want, you can unconsciously (instinctively) cause a feeling of anger in yourself in order to force another person to obey you. So, anger helps you take control of the situation. Anger helps to gain the upper hand in an argument, to even the score, to avenge their failures. Anger can also be used to protect your rights. With the help of anger, we let the enemy understand that he must retreat. Being angry at yourself can be a way to force yourself to do something, to take up a job or a job that we are afraid of. Anger can also be a trigger for starting actions (to go on a diet, for example). Or a way to punish yourself for failures.
2. Sadness, longing. This is our way of expressing dissatisfaction with ourselves, with our achievements. And also a way to react to your frustration with other people or a situation. It can also be a form of compassion. You sympathize with the fact that someone has had an accident, and you express your attitude, your reaction with sadness.
3. Irritation. This is a weak form of anger. It appears when someone's behavior provokes and makes you nervous. It serves to demonstrate discontent, to stop something that hinders us. It helps us to stop stagnation and encourage ourselves to take action. In all cases, behind the irritation lies the desire to take control of the situation. That is, we get annoyed when everything is not done as we said.
4. Feeling guilty. This is a form of self-punishment. Sometimes it helps us avoid responsibility for our mistakes. Yes, I feel guilty, I repent, and I don't need to do anything else. Sometimes guilt is a form of superiority: I am so highly developed that I even suffer about my erroneous actions. Guilt is a very destructive emotion, it signals that you need to change something in yourself. We need to figure out where it came from: it was imposed on us by upbringing and, therefore, for no reason, or we really did something unsightly. Then you need to analyze the reason for the act, sincerely forgive yourself and promise that this will not happen again. It will be good if we compensate for the damage or apologize to those who were offended.
5. Disappointment. It is intended for the manifestation of displeasure in those situations when we do not get what we want.
6. Fear or anxiety. These emotions are associated with the instinct of self-preservation. Their task is to protect us, to prevent dangerous situations. Fear "draws" pictures of unpleasant surprises and obstacles, our failure, bankruptcy. But his task is not to interfere with you, but to help: to warn about the danger, to show the real situation, to indicate where the pitfalls may lurk, so that we are ready for difficulties. Therefore, it is unwise to ignore fear and go ahead. And anxiety can be a premonition. It is worth finding a rational grain in these emotions. Then they change the polarity, charge us with energy and encourage us to act.
7. Despair. It appears when repeated tests and efforts to achieve something did not bring the desired results. Despair is a deep despondency that "gives us the right" to refuse further attempts.
8. Apathy. This is a delicate weak form of rebellion against something. As a rule, they are shown by those who do not have the strength or ability to rebel openly. A passive demonstration of strength and disagreement.
9. Depression. It is also a form of taking control. You withdraw from business, you fall out of the flow of life. Others can't get anything out of you, and are forced to take on your responsibilities. Sometimes depression is a passive form of expressing rage. It becomes an instrument of sophisticated manipulation of others, and it works perfectly, causing a sense of guilt in the person to whom it is addressed.
10. Despondency. This means that you must allow yourself to take a break from your activities. Or there is an insistent inner need to give up something. Maybe you're just tired.